Sunday, December 15, 2013

Currently {December}

I have been very absent from blogging as of lately. It's not because I don't have the time either... I think I am just stuck. Writer's block. I decided to grab a list of verbs and describe what's been going on in my life this month (and some time before that). As I chose verbs, I realized I picked a lot of happy-feel-good-self-growth-kinda-words. And I think that's rather fitting. Here's an update on me: 

Accepting that I certainly do not have the power to change some things. 
Admiring other Peace Corps Volunteers who pour their heart and soul into our work here. 
Acknowledging my shortcomings. And making peace with them. 
Appreciating all the beautiful blessings in my life; lessons, opportunities, people. 
Believing that there is a higher purpose for all of us. 
Challenging my previous believes and stances on life. 
Clearing a space in my heart for all that is to come in life. 
Compiling video clips of the cutest, sweetest, most wonderful kiddos who have stolen my heart. 
Crying because I'm heartbroken over the daunting task of saying good-bye to loved ones in Botswana. 
Delighting in the Lord and His work. 
Developing a plan for how to get the most out of my last six months here. 
Enjoying the clouds that are currently bringing the temperature down a few degrees. 
Entertaining Peace Corps Volunteers passing through my village for their holiday adventures. 
Expanding my mind with new readings on my Nook.
Feeling like I can breathe again. Feeling like myself again. 
Forgetting all the times I've let myself down and all the things I cannot change. 
Forgiving myself for my imperfections. Forgiving others for theirs too. 
Gushing over Michael and how wonderful he has been to me the past two years. 
Hoping to leave some kind of lasting impact on the people in my community. 
Hurting from ignorant conversations with men about Gender Based Violence. 
Ignoring the sand that constantly blows through the windows and doors. My house is never clean. 
Imagining life back in the states and what it might look like for me. 
Laughing at the TV show New Girl
Learning that no one has all the answers or right moves. 
Leaving Botswana in less than six months. Yikes. 
Listening to the playlist I've compiled for my video montage of the kiddos. 
Longing for some real produce selection and the money to afford it. My diet is highly unbalanced. 
Loving each and every person in my life. 
Missing my family, friends, and boyfriend during the holiday season. 
Mourning over the violence and hatred throughout the world. 
Noticing that life is much more simple than I ever imagined. 
Overflowing with joy, love, and compassion. I just love people. 
Painting a beautiful picture of my life. 
Playing with my beloved kiddos, each and every day. 
Pondering about how to fix the health care system. 
Realizing that someday, there will be an imbalance of my yesterday's and tomorrow's. 
Rejoicing that I have learned so much about myself and life at such a young age. 
Remembering all my sweet friends fighting back home fighting against cancer. 
Standing strong, standing still. 
Steering my life in a direction I'm excited about. 
Teaching patients at the clinic how to take responsibility for their own health.
Thanking my lucky stars for this life of mine. 
Thinking about how life is a never ending to-do list, and that's a good thing. 
Trying not to melt in this lovely heat in the Kalahari Desert. 
Understanding that everything really, truly happens for a reason. Nobutseriously. 
Waiting patiently for all the pieces to fall into place. 
Wanting Kate to hurry up and get here so we can spend a month traveling, talking, and catching up! 
Welcoming all life lessons, no matter how frustrating or annoying the situation may feel at the time. 
Worrying about how I'm going to cope with my transition in June. 
Writing more often and more honestly. Promise. :o) 

Love & Light, 

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